Life tends to be unexpected at the very least.
For me a little thing called transsexual kind of
caught me off guard. When I came out to my
wife I told her that all I was a crossdresser. All
that changed when I did some real soul
searching. I now consider myself a
transsexual and am starting to come to grips
with it all. The following is a little about myself
and my journey. More will be added in the
future. Also please lend me advice if you have
any to give. THANKS EVA
For me a little thing called transsexual kind of
caught me off guard. When I came out to my
wife I told her that all I was a crossdresser. All
that changed when I did some real soul
searching. I now consider myself a
transsexual and am starting to come to grips
with it all. The following is a little about myself
and my journey. More will be added in the
future. Also please lend me advice if you have
any to give. THANKS EVA
THE OLD ME
Hi my name is Eva noel and I
am a transgendered person. For people
who might not know what this means let
me explain. I am a genetic male who
happens to relate very much to his female
side. In fact I relate so well that I have a
strong desire to dress,act, and even take
on the persona of a woman.I am married
and have two children. My wife does know
about Eva in fact she gave Eva her name.
Like most transgendered people I began
dressing at an early age. Also like many
transgendered people I found myself binge
and purging all my clothes and makeup.I
also remember telling myself never again
only to find myself dressing to even
greater lengths the next time I dressed.
Along with this binge & purge came great
since of guilt ,depression ,and thoughts of
suicide.In my youth I could never fit in with
others and became very despondent
toward society. Some of my guilt stemmed
from the fact that I was a Christian and
crossdressing was against all that I stood
for. Other parts of my guilts stemmed from
society,and from the fact I didn't want to
hurt my family. Despite the fact that I
promised myself many times to quit
dressing it continues to this day.I did move
away from it for awhile after I met my wife,
but after two years the need and desire to
dress came back stronger than ever. It was
at this time that I turned to the vast
resources of the Internet in search for the
answer why I dress,and how to cure
myself from it. Unfortunately I found out
that nobody knows why exactly some
people feel the need to dress,and that
nobody has come up with a cure for
dressing. There are so theories as to why
people dress some include society,others
include that the brain may be made up
different,and still others blame the delay in
the hormones that determine sex before
you are born. Whatever the reasons I did
find a couple a sites that helped me cope
with my religious beliefs. Because of this I
was finally able to get up the courage to
tell my wife.
Well as I stated above I finally acquired enough courage to finally tell my
wife. When I broke the news to her she seemed quite shocked to say the
least,but after many long conversations ,and much needed prayers we
worked through our problems. My wife feels that this is more than just
about dressing , and so do I. We both feel that this is a big part of who I
really am.In fact I would have to say that in some aspects she is more open
then even me about Eva. My wife more than just offers support she buys
me things I need she helps me with who I am,and allows Eva to be her best
girl friend.
The future holds many things one of which is that me and my wife can
grow closer than ever before, and with absolutely no boundaries between
us. Another thing the future holds is that Eva can finally have somewhat of
a true existence,and be able to share that existence with someone who
cares. Among the things the future holds is that my wife and I seem to be
able to have fun together while sharing this part of my life together. So in
closing let me just say as long as my wife is willing to accept me for who I
am the future is looking bright.
I recently did a little self discovery of myself. In this self
discovery I realized that I'm not a crossdresser ,but instead I'm a
transsexual. I came to this realization by looking back on my life.
I remember when I was about five wrapping a towel around my
waist and pretending that it was a dress and I was a girl. Latter
on in my life I recall dressing up every chance I got. I also
remember thinking just how wonderful it would be to be a girl.
As I grew up the urge became stronger I remember sitting up all
night asking GOD to turn me into a girl,but alas come mourning
I was always still a boy. The desire was so strong that I thought
about suicide constantly. My thought was if I couldn't be who I
wanted to be I was better off dead. I even went as far as to
attempt to castrate myself with a knife but I chickened out when
I drew blood. I also remember trying hormones .My mom was on
them for a time and the doctor took her off them so she through
her prescriptions away and I promptly removed them from the
garbage. There was about a month supply of them in the bottle
and I took them all one a day for a month. That brings me to
today. I am happily married. I have two wonderful kids. I should
be so happy and content with the way my life has
progressed, but lurking in my mind is the desire to be the
woman I feel (know) I am.
My wife and I have decided to go beyond the dressing and let Eva have
her existence. After only a year of coming out to my wife about my little
secret we came to the conclusion that the only way to go is forward. We
decided that Eva is a real person ,and cannot remain hidden forever.
Therefore we have decided to rid Eva of her facial hair, as well as start her
on hormones. By doing this we hope to help Eva look more like she feels.
There is a good side to this my wife says that she is more attracted to me
as a woman. I don't know when I will come out to my family , friends ,and
work.I do however know that when I do it won't be to far down the road.
I have been making many strides in my quest to become more of the
woman I feel I am. I am growing my hair out . I now have pierced ears as
well. When I pierced my ears I was dressed as Eva . I was so worried
about whether I passed or not but it didn't stop me . Sometime after getting
my ears pierced I was cleaning them out when I spilled my cleaning
solution. So I sent my wife in to the same place that I got my ears pierced
to get some more cleaning solution. The girl behind the counter
recognized her from when I got them pierced ,and inquired about her
sister meaning me. I also am looking for a electrolysis, therapist, and
hormones.
Beth and I recently renewed our vows. We both decided to be ourselves. I
finally got a chance to be a bride ! We exchanged the vows , had a
Wedding cake ,and had a Wedding dance . Over all we had a great
wedding . We plan to do it again sometime in the future . The next time
however we hope to go wedding dress shopping together.
I recently started hormones ! That is to say I've been on them for a month
now . Even though I still would like to find a endocrinologist I decided to
begin hrt unsupervised . The affects are quite satisfying . I still have not
been able to locate a therapist , but hope to find one soon .I was able to
locate an electrolysis ,and hope to start removing my facial hair after the
new year. If there is anyone out there who knows of a therapist or
endocrinologist located in Northern Wisconsin please let me know.
I'm sorry for not updating this site. The reason I have not
updated is because my Father passed away. So now
after several month's of mourning I finally have the
energy , and desire to update this site. I have added stats
to this page for people who may be interested. The
hormones are going well in fact I am beginning to look
more like a woman every day.I can no longer go around
in just a t-shirt any more. However I may have to stop
taking hormones for awhile for fear of losing my job
because of drug testing. It appears that they require a
prescription from your doctor if you are taking any
medications that require a prescription . I get my
medication over the Internet ,because I can't find a
doctor in my area that cares for transsexuals. My wife
and I are planning to renew our vow's again this coming
Christmas. I hope that I can get some good pic's of the
Wedding for this site. I am sorry I am not going to be able
to take pictures for awhile because I had to cut my hair
for the funeral.
Hi my name is Eva noel and I
am a transgendered person. For people
who might not know what this means let
me explain. I am a genetic male who
happens to relate very much to his female
side. In fact I relate so well that I have a
strong desire to dress,act, and even take
on the persona of a woman.I am married
and have two children. My wife does know
about Eva in fact she gave Eva her name.
Like most transgendered people I began
dressing at an early age. Also like many
transgendered people I found myself binge
and purging all my clothes and makeup.I
also remember telling myself never again
only to find myself dressing to even
greater lengths the next time I dressed.
Along with this binge & purge came great
since of guilt ,depression ,and thoughts of
suicide.In my youth I could never fit in with
others and became very despondent
toward society. Some of my guilt stemmed
from the fact that I was a Christian and
crossdressing was against all that I stood
for. Other parts of my guilts stemmed from
society,and from the fact I didn't want to
hurt my family. Despite the fact that I
promised myself many times to quit
dressing it continues to this day.I did move
away from it for awhile after I met my wife,
but after two years the need and desire to
dress came back stronger than ever. It was
at this time that I turned to the vast
resources of the Internet in search for the
answer why I dress,and how to cure
myself from it. Unfortunately I found out
that nobody knows why exactly some
people feel the need to dress,and that
nobody has come up with a cure for
dressing. There are so theories as to why
people dress some include society,others
include that the brain may be made up
different,and still others blame the delay in
the hormones that determine sex before
you are born. Whatever the reasons I did
find a couple a sites that helped me cope
with my religious beliefs. Because of this I
was finally able to get up the courage to
tell my wife.
Well as I stated above I finally acquired enough courage to finally tell my
wife. When I broke the news to her she seemed quite shocked to say the
least,but after many long conversations ,and much needed prayers we
worked through our problems. My wife feels that this is more than just
about dressing , and so do I. We both feel that this is a big part of who I
really am.In fact I would have to say that in some aspects she is more open
then even me about Eva. My wife more than just offers support she buys
me things I need she helps me with who I am,and allows Eva to be her best
girl friend.
The future holds many things one of which is that me and my wife can
grow closer than ever before, and with absolutely no boundaries between
us. Another thing the future holds is that Eva can finally have somewhat of
a true existence,and be able to share that existence with someone who
cares. Among the things the future holds is that my wife and I seem to be
able to have fun together while sharing this part of my life together. So in
closing let me just say as long as my wife is willing to accept me for who I
am the future is looking bright.
I recently did a little self discovery of myself. In this self
discovery I realized that I'm not a crossdresser ,but instead I'm a
transsexual. I came to this realization by looking back on my life.
I remember when I was about five wrapping a towel around my
waist and pretending that it was a dress and I was a girl. Latter
on in my life I recall dressing up every chance I got. I also
remember thinking just how wonderful it would be to be a girl.
As I grew up the urge became stronger I remember sitting up all
night asking GOD to turn me into a girl,but alas come mourning
I was always still a boy. The desire was so strong that I thought
about suicide constantly. My thought was if I couldn't be who I
wanted to be I was better off dead. I even went as far as to
attempt to castrate myself with a knife but I chickened out when
I drew blood. I also remember trying hormones .My mom was on
them for a time and the doctor took her off them so she through
her prescriptions away and I promptly removed them from the
garbage. There was about a month supply of them in the bottle
and I took them all one a day for a month. That brings me to
today. I am happily married. I have two wonderful kids. I should
be so happy and content with the way my life has
progressed, but lurking in my mind is the desire to be the
woman I feel (know) I am.
My wife and I have decided to go beyond the dressing and let Eva have
her existence. After only a year of coming out to my wife about my little
secret we came to the conclusion that the only way to go is forward. We
decided that Eva is a real person ,and cannot remain hidden forever.
Therefore we have decided to rid Eva of her facial hair, as well as start her
on hormones. By doing this we hope to help Eva look more like she feels.
There is a good side to this my wife says that she is more attracted to me
as a woman. I don't know when I will come out to my family , friends ,and
work.I do however know that when I do it won't be to far down the road.
I have been making many strides in my quest to become more of the
woman I feel I am. I am growing my hair out . I now have pierced ears as
well. When I pierced my ears I was dressed as Eva . I was so worried
about whether I passed or not but it didn't stop me . Sometime after getting
my ears pierced I was cleaning them out when I spilled my cleaning
solution. So I sent my wife in to the same place that I got my ears pierced
to get some more cleaning solution. The girl behind the counter
recognized her from when I got them pierced ,and inquired about her
sister meaning me. I also am looking for a electrolysis, therapist, and
hormones.
Beth and I recently renewed our vows. We both decided to be ourselves. I
finally got a chance to be a bride ! We exchanged the vows , had a
Wedding cake ,and had a Wedding dance . Over all we had a great
wedding . We plan to do it again sometime in the future . The next time
however we hope to go wedding dress shopping together.
I recently started hormones ! That is to say I've been on them for a month
now . Even though I still would like to find a endocrinologist I decided to
begin hrt unsupervised . The affects are quite satisfying . I still have not
been able to locate a therapist , but hope to find one soon .I was able to
locate an electrolysis ,and hope to start removing my facial hair after the
new year. If there is anyone out there who knows of a therapist or
endocrinologist located in Northern Wisconsin please let me know.
I'm sorry for not updating this site. The reason I have not
updated is because my Father passed away. So now
after several month's of mourning I finally have the
energy , and desire to update this site. I have added stats
to this page for people who may be interested. The
hormones are going well in fact I am beginning to look
more like a woman every day.I can no longer go around
in just a t-shirt any more. However I may have to stop
taking hormones for awhile for fear of losing my job
because of drug testing. It appears that they require a
prescription from your doctor if you are taking any
medications that require a prescription . I get my
medication over the Internet ,because I can't find a
doctor in my area that cares for transsexuals. My wife
and I are planning to renew our vow's again this coming
Christmas. I hope that I can get some good pic's of the
Wedding for this site. I am sorry I am not going to be able
to take pictures for awhile because I had to cut my hair
for the funeral.
STATS
Age: 34
weight: 165
height: 5'6"
measurements:
36b - 33 waist -
40 hips
hair: dark brown
eye's: blue
started on
hormones:
09/06/2004
Age: 34
weight: 165
height: 5'6"
measurements:
36b - 33 waist -
40 hips
hair: dark brown
eye's: blue
started on
hormones:
09/06/2004
FACT'S PAGE ONE
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
Please click here to fe-mail Eva
